MONSTERS CONQUER YOUR EARBUDS

(Thanks to a TON of help and expertise from podcast co-creator/co-host Ralph,) Monsters Conquer the World now has an all-audio cousin! You can get your first micro-taste of the Monsters Conquer the World podcast here: http://monstersconquer.podbean.com/

We’ve got a whole mess of episodes planned, ranging from kaiju movies to cryptids to folklore monsters from around the world and MORE! Stay tuned for updates and new episodes!

You can come yak with us on our Discord server too! Stay up to date on podcast and blog developments, keep up with our video game stream Super Apartment Friends, and of course engage in the choicest kaiju conversation and general fun-loving, good-natured grab-assery here: https://discord.gg/9DGkMYP

ALSO! If you’re digging what we’ve got going here, maybe consider becoming a Patron? The $5 monthly level will get access to exclusive bonus podcast content, and depending on how things go, we might introduce additional levels with additional goodies! Just like the monsters I love so very dearly, we are growing, mutating, and evolving into something bigger, badder, and beautifuler.

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Revenge of the Most Punchable Face in the Universe!

Godzilla_Anime_2_PosterSo the monthly reviews haven’t exactly been uh, monthly in a while, have they? A solid six months of the hiatus (starting last July) I can pin on getting, struggling with, and moving on from a job that was not a good fit.  The months after that are on me: adjusting to a new job, trying to make time for my people, balancing my other creative endeavors, and wrangling my stupid trash brain all left me without the normal level of chutzpah (and just, you know, time) I need to crank out reviews for your brain and eyeballs.

That stuff’s all true and accurate, but I couldn’t put my finger on why the holdup went on for so long after I worked out the job stuff.  Why have I had blogger’s constipation block? The big reason hadn’t dawned on me until VERY recently: IT’S BECAUSE I’VE BEEN SUBCONSCIOUSLY PUTTING OFF REVIEWING THE SECOND TWO GODZILLA ANIME MOVIES.

I wasn’t exactly crazy about Godzilla: Planet of the Monsters, so the prospect of two more full feature films in that world didn’t have me champing at the bit to do more watching and writing.  I’m the one fucking bizarro-world film fan that would rather write about stuff I love than dunk on shit I hate (which to be fair, I don’t hate PotM, just its cruel narcissist protagonist). Big ups then are in order for friend of the blog Ariccio, who Anime_Godzilla_3graciously hosted a stream of Godzilla: City on the Edge of Battle and Godzilla: The Planet Eater.  Powering through them both on my own wasn’t something I looked forward to, but knocking ’em out with a bud was a pretty fuckin’ fun afternoon. It also helps that the movies genuinely get progressively better!

Since both sequels were handled by the same creative team as Planet of the Monsters, and since they all collectively tell one big, over-arching story  in the same unique world, I’m rolling my reviews of the two movies into one slightly lighter than normal article. A lot of the behind the scenes/deep dive stuff I normally do was already covered in my PotM review, anyway, so there’s just less junk to ramble about. That said, there’s still plenty of junk to ramble about! Put on your spacesuit, slather yourself in bug-dust, and pray for the second coming of Ghidorah, because we’re finishing this fuckin’ trilogy!

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Put on your best kaiju-slacks, I talked to the creator of Kaijumax!

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The internet and social media have a tendency to be a big soul-grinding bummer, especially the past few years.  Hacking, cyberbullying, people screaming at each other over everything, finding out your aunt is racist on Facebook, YouTube comments–it sucks! It sucks so much that it’s easy to forget that it can facilitate some really surreal and nifty stuff, like getting to randomly pick the brain of the creator of your favorite comic book.

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I shot the shit with the guy who makes this today!

With the final issue of season 4 on the horizon, Kaijumax creator/artist/author Zander Cannon took to Twitter and fielded questions from whatever chucklefucks happened by.  I happened to be one of those chucklefucks!  I haven’t talked about Kaijumax much here on the blog.  I love it to death, and I yammer about it a little more on social media and Super Apartment Friends streams, but I still haven’t gotten around to doing a big review of it yet. So what’s the deal with Kaijumax? What juicy nugs did Cannon reveal on Tweetzone.biz? Keep reading!

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MONSTERS CONQUER FACEBOOK

Believe it or not, there is a March review in the works! I’m still trying to get back into my old monthly review groove, but I’m not quite there yet.  That makes this Facebook news all the more heartening:

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Holy balls!  I started planning a celebratory movie marathon when we hit 200 likes a month or two ago, and out of nowhere we blew right through three hundo!  In a world full of social media professionals, Instagram models,  Twitter influencers, YouTube celebs, and whatever the fuck TikTok is, 300 likes on ye olde Book-Face might not seem like a big deal.  But for me, a random dipshit excitedly cussing on the internet about Godzilla, it’s insanely cool and exciting.  So that marathon?! OH YEAH BUDDY IT’S HAPPENIN’

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Here’s a mind-bendingly subtle hint about one of the features in the lineup. Good luck solving this Da Vinci Code, fuckers.

This is our first marathon through Facebook’s Watch Party feature, so we’ll see how it goes! If it works as intended, it’ll probably be the future of MCTW movie marathons (easy to use, baked-in community text chat).  The mayhem starts Sunday, March 31st at 12 noon here: https://www.facebook.com/monstersconquertheworld/.  See you then!!!

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Don’t be a Gamera: Pooper Monster Check Out Gamera: Super Monster! (Part 2 of 2)

hqdefaultAfter a long and unplanned hiatus, I’m back! And yes, I’m back specifically to finish my long-delayed review of Gamera: Super Monster.

Yes, that Super Monster.  Yes, I’m serious. Its purported badness draws me in like a Mothra to a flame,  but I also really like how fucking weird and doofy (but still sweet!) this flick is. There’s enough unique, charming strangeness here to merit a deep dive.

If you haven’t already, be sure to give part 1 a read here.  Or don’t?  That might be an intriguing/hilarious social experiment!  If you haven’t seen this movie and haven’t read part 1 of my review, go ahead and read this and see if anything that follows makes any fucking sense at all.  If it does, congratulations, you’re either having a nervous breakdown or you’ve achieved total consciousness.

Even if you have seen the movie and/or read the first part of my review, it can still seem like a delightful fever dream: size-shifting Space Women sleep in an invulnerable lunchbox, they operate flying vans and dimensional portals with Casios and look upon Gamera as he relives his greatest Showa-era battles…  who in turn sometimes looks upon random clips of anime… all while a Star Destroyer bombards them with threats and orbital laser strikes! Ready for more?!  TOO BAD!

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Don’t be a Gamera: Pooper Monster, Check Out Gamera: Super Monster! (Part 1 of 2)

tumblr_ofl2y8k4wl1rwn81uo1_1280Ahhhh, Gamera: Super Monster, we meet at last! I had never seen the 1980 entry in the Gamera series until this last month.  Its reputation might lead you to believe I was avoiding it, but come on, you know me better than that!  I was saving this heaping helping of stock-footage fueled weirdness for a rainy (or Michigan-humid) day!

This is a good thing and a bad thing.  The good thing is that I had a lot of fun finally cracking this nut–I basically gifted myself a ridiculous cinematic dessert.  The bad thing is that by the time I snuggled in to watch Super Monster, I had already found out most of its best/strangest details.  In case you’ve never seen this thing and want to ensure you have the maximum WTF experience, I won’t spoil it by listing out all the madness here.  All you really need to know going in is that Super Monster was a blatantly desperate attempt to pump funds into the dying (now long-dead) Daiei studio and it was made on the shoestringiest of budgets (even by Gamera standards).

So fire up your electric organ, fly your magic van someplace safe, and start talkin’ to your watch, because we’re diving in to Gamera: Super Monster!

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KAIJULY ROARS BACK TO LIFE

The June review is just getting later, buuuuuuuttt:

Kaijuly 100!

HOLY BALLS YOU GUYS! IT’S A KAIJULY MIRACLE!  As promised, I’m gonna stream a whole MESS of kaiju stuff over on starting this Saturday evening (probably like 6-ish?)! in the afternoon on Sunday the 15th!   Stay tuned for updates and feel free to throw suggestions at me!

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Kaijuly is also stomping all over the Twitch stream I co-run, Super Apartment Friends! I’m going to (finally) give Super Godzilla another try tonight at 9, with more monsterrific gaming gauntlets throughout the month.  KAIJULY FEVER: CATCH IT!

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I’m Queen Leodon!  #YASSSSKWEEN

UPDATE

The KAIJULY 100 stream is just around the corner, so I’ve rounded up a big fat playlist of kaiju krunchies, monster munchies, and dino delites! There are deffo some oddballs and curveballs in there too, including some stuff that I’ve never watched before! Those could be FUCKING HORRIBLE for all I know, but it wouldn’t be fun without a little danger, right? Start time TBD, but it’s a school night so I’m aiming to start in the afternoon and wrap up in the evening. Be there or Ghidorah will zap your little fanny!

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Ultraman Review Part 8: Episodes 19 & 20

d17b65bc3cd82d6ba08157d1422ea621Reviewing more Ultraman episodes after a couple months of movie reviews (especially new zillion-dollar Hollywood movies) has weirdly started to feel like coming home.  One of the benefits of Ultraman being a steadily episodic TV series instead of a more disjointed film series like Godzilla or Gamera is its charming and consistent human cast.  I wasn’t so sure about these orange-clad action-scientists early on, but now I tune in for them almost (almost) as much as I do for the giant monster smackdowns!

This month’s duo of episodes load us up with demons, ghosts, and blood feuds that span time and the very barrier between life and death! If you haven’t read any of my Ultraman episode reviews, you’ll probably want to start from the beginning, or maybe just refresh yourself on the most recent round of reviews.  Grab your time capsule and look both ways before crossing Route 87, because it’s time to get ULTRA!

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BINGO BANGO 75 LIKES ON BOOK-FACE!

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We just GOTSTA have a little viewing party to celebrate! This Saturday at 2PM (Eastern) I’ll celebrate 75 likes on ye olde Tome of Faces with an Ultraseven….ty-five marathon! Drop in here: https://www.rabb.it/MonstersConquerTheWorld this Saturday if you can!

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This month’s Ultraman review is still coming too, so keep an eye peeled! The last day of May is still May!