MCTW Podcast: Jason X!

Posted on August 16, 2019 by Batt Scare-It

Holy frick! Oh doink! Shelley, one of our ruggedly handsome and effortlessly charming Patrons, has ascended to Godzilla status, giving them the atomic power to choose the discussion topic for an episode of Monsters Conquer the World Podcast! In their infinite wisdom they have chosen 2001’s Jason X! It’s a movie with everything! Space Jason (Spaceon)! Schrödinger’s robot nipples! Hilarious-looking future fashion! Oh yeah, and grisly, interplanetary murder. Almost forgot that last one.

We dive into all that and discuss the state of the Friday the 13th/Jason franchise, how Scream flipped the horror world upside down in the late 90s, Teletubbies, and our pitches for Jason’s next big stab-tastic adventure!

Join in the blood-splattered, deep space fun on your favorite podcast app, or click this lil’ link: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/monsters-conquer-the-world

Shelley has dedicated this episode to Goofy Goof (a.k.a. “George Geef”???) and would like us all to take a moment to remember that the wacky, gangly dog-man is also a heartbreakingly good and loving father. It’s a sentiment Ralph and I agree with vigorously and one that is especially salient with regards to Jason X’s Shadow Episode, which our Patrons will have access to in the very near future…

MCTW Podcast: Godzilla vs. Gigan!

Posted on July 24, 2019 by Batt Scare-It

godzilla-vs-gigan-plish-film-poster-1977 Monsters Conquer the World Podcast is back for more Godzilla (but it’s only Godzilla if it comes from the Godzilla region of France, otherwise it’s just sparkling kaiju)! This time we’re digging in to 1972’s Godzilla vs. Gigan, a wacky tag-team rock ’em sock ’em epic about a cartoonist, weaponized corn, and a misbegotten amusement park!

We chat about PERFECT PEACE, the fascinating secrets of pro wrestling, and loud chewing! Oh and of course, the fact that 90s sci-fi comedy classic Men in Black ripped this off pretty much from top to bottom.

Hit up your favorite podcast app to listen in or just smack this link-a-rino:

https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/monsters-conquer-the-world

Some thrilling news too: if you become a Patron at our brand new G O D Z I L L A tier, you can actually pick what we yap about for an episode! WHAT?! Have we like, FULLY baked our noodles here? MAYBE! Zip-zap-zop on over to our Patreon page for all the diggity-deets! As always, hopping on at the El Chupacabra tier grants you access to our top secret shadow episodes–full bonus episodes that drop right alongside the normal ones! It’s very Us of us. This time we chat about Crawl, the recent ‘gator flick! Enjoy! 🐲🎧

MCTW Podcast: Gamera vs. Jiger!

Posted on July 12, 2019 by Batt Scare-It

3084393010_3e64c94602_b Monsters Conquer the World Podcast makes its first run at Gamera! 1970’s creature classic: Gamera vs. Jiger! I purposely told Ralph nothing about the movie going in–it is supremely fun experiencing it alongside a first-timer!

We sift through all the joyful insanity that is Gamera vs. Jiger and muse on Gamera’s capacity for baby fever, heroic child endangerment, a furious, heartbroken bouquet bashing, the disgusting beast Santa that we all hate, and that’s all before the final segment where we contemplate upcoming MCTW Podcast episodes!

Grab it on your podcatcher of choice, or slap this stinky linky for all the monster mashing mirth and mayhem:

https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/monsters-conquer-the-world

It’s all part of the KAIJULY craziness! If you want even more MCTW Podcast for your (hopefully telephone-pole free) earholes, consider becoming a Patron at the $5 level! Doing so grants you access to the Illuminati-like inner circle where you can listen to the forbidden Shadow Episodes. In this one we talk about the recent Child’s Play reboot!

Whether you plunge into the Shadow World or stay in the Light, I hope you enjoy our stuff!

KAIJULY 2019

Posted on July 10, 2019 by Batt Scare-It

It’s that magical time of year: Kaijuly! Artists are churning out daily kaiju pieces (as always I’m getting a big kick out of Lisa Naffziger’s work), lucky Chicago-bound lil’ stinkers will be hitting up G-Fest this weekend, and today is fricking Ultraman Day! Monsters Conquer the World and Super Apartment Friends are joining in the monster mayhem too! Ralph and I just recorded a Monsters Conquer the World Podcast episode about Gamera vs. Jiger! That’ll be popping up in your favorite podcatcher soon! It was really, really fun watching this with someone who had no idea what they were getting into.

I can earnestly say the episode will be worth a listen for Ralph’s monster impersonations alone.

But wait, there’s even more Kaijuly coolness! Czech it:

Continue reading →

Don’t be a Godzilla: Ding-a-ling of the Monsters, Check out Godzilla: King of the Monsters!

Posted on June 30, 2019 by Batt Scare-It

Holy goddamn, guys, it’s here! It’s been here for a little while now! Didja see it? If not, go see it before you read this!

Of course I’m talking about John Wick: Chapter 3 – Parabellum!

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Uhh, joke or not, you should actually totally see this if you haven’t yet. I mean I love kaiju shit more than most, but the J-Dub movies fucking S L A P. Totally pure, no bullshit, pedal-to-the-metal, balls-to-the-wall action/revenge movie paradise. 3’s got axes, horses, MORE dogs, Halle Berry with dogs, and of course, the universe’s favorite son Keanu doing all the Keanu junk we all love.

No of course I’m talking about Godzilla: King of the [MOTHER FUCKING] Monsters! It is… so much. The five year wait is finally over, and Big Fella is back on silver screens tearing shit UP. By now you’ve probably heard a lot about KOTM–what critics thought, what box office bean counters thought, and you might have even already heard what my friend Ralph and I thought IMMEDIATELY after watching it. But some time has passed, I’ve actually had a chance to process it, and I wanna REALLY dig into this mo-fo. You know, do that old school MONSTERS CONQUER THE WORLD SHIT.

Are the critics right? Are the fans right? Is it like a lot of things in life, something nebulous in the middle? Did I ascend to the next plane of consciousness watching this thing? Hop aboard the Argo, fire up the Orca and say hi to Kevin, because we’re entering the realm of GODZILLA: KING OF THE MONSTERS

Continue reading →

MCTW Podcast: Bigfoot!

Posted on June 21, 2019 by Batt Scare-It

bigfoot-patterson-film Monsters Conquer the World Podcast is back with our first non-movie episode! With the release of the FBI’s actual Bigfoot files earlier this month, Ralph and I just HAD to cover the Pacific Northwest’s most elusive celebrity! It’s our first cryptid episode!

We give you a crash course on cryptids, the scientific possibility of ol’ ‘Squatch-a-rino, a full breakdown of the (in)famous Patterson-Gimlin film, and look at the surprisingly profound way Bigfoot permeates our collective imaginations. Bigfoot’s got a longer history than I realized, and has been the star of countless folktales, films, TV shows and uh, even some adult-oriented media. We dip a gigantic toe into it all, baby!

Here’s the Stitcher link: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/monsters-conquer-the-world, but you can grab it wherever you obtain your favorite podded casts. If you like what you hear (or even if you don’t, you can be honest with us, we can take it!) give us a rate and/or review on Apple Podcasts, subscribe if you use a different service, tell your friends, post about it on MySpace, transcribe the entire episode into a salt pentagram in your basement,

Also, SO HELP ME GOD(zilla), the King of the Monsters blog review is coming at the end of the month. So watch for that too. Thanks for stopping by!

MONSTERS CONQUER YOUR LIQUOR CABINET

Posted on June 9, 2019 by Batt Scare-It

HOLY SHIT! Our friend Richard concocted a cocktail inspired by the podcast and our BURNING love for monsters! Straight scoop from the mixologist’s mouth:

“My buddies, Matt and Ralph have a cool new podcast called Monsters Conquer the World. To commemorate their new adventure I created my first ever cocktail. I call it the King of the Monsters. Kiwi, apple, pineapple, lime and orange juices with rum, orange curacao, lemoncello, and orgeat with a couple dashes of bitters. I garnished it with a seaweed Godzilla, pineapple spears, and a flaming 151 float on a slice of lemon. It tastes pretty good and packs a monster-sized punch.”

Talk about a little somethin’ to take the nuclear edge off! First round’s on me! 🍹🦖💥

MCTW Podcast: Godzilla: King of the Monsters

Posted on June 4, 2019 by Batt Scare-It

godzilla-kingofthemonsters-japaneseposter-full-700x991 Ralph and I saw Godzilla: King of the Monsters, so you better believe we’ve got a big, juicy, turgid new episode of the Monsters Conquer the World podcast ready and waiting for you! We’re on the Google Podcasts app now, so you can’t escape us! We’re everywhere! But in a cool, fun way. Like cheeky prankster ghosts or helpful, centipede-eating spiders.

We dig into the great, the good, and the uh not-quite-as-good aspects of the film. We go frickin’ spoiler crazy starting at 14:50, so you’ve been warned! Ralph is as insightful as ever, but there is also a non-zero chance he may hail from a parallel dimension. We also wax philosophical on the World’s Strongest Man competition, cinematic treasure Jason X, and indulge in some extended Bradley Whitford appreciation. Either hit us up on your pod-catcher of choice or click below and SMURSH that play button:

https://monstersconquer.podbean.com/e/godzilla-king-of-the-monsters-1559636457/

Digging it? Liking it? If yes, be sure to subscribe, rate us, tell your friends, whatever you can do! Anything you can do really does help, and you taking the time to do that means the (Monsters Conquer the) world to us.

Godzilla: King of the Monsters — Micro Review

Posted on May 31, 2019 by Batt Scare-It

Just got home from Godzilla: King of the Monsters. Here’s my spoiler-free micro-review:

HO-LEEEE FUCKING SHIT

If you are reading this I can all but gurantee you will have a shit-ton of fun seeing this bad boy in the theater. There is so much to unpack here, gang. Fuller, deeper, spoiler-ier thoughts and content are on the way (after at least one more viewing 😉 ). Until then, check out this actual footage of me watching the movie:

“Hahahah yay, horray!”

MCTW Podcast: Ghidrah, The Three-Headed Monster!

Posted on May 21, 2019 by Batt Scare-It

A1mC2faIfpL._SY679_ Holy shit! A full-blown, for-realsies podcast episode! I (a monster movie fanatic) yak with Ralph (a kaiju-curious new guy) about Ghidrah, The Three-Headed Monster! I’ve got the trivia nugs and industry secrets, but Ralph’s fresh eyes see a thoughtful, deeper meaning in the mayhem! Plus we frame the subs vs. dubs debate with the timeless classic Hercules in New York, reflect on the heart-wrenching father-son drama of A Goofy Movie, channel the wandering spirit of Don Knotts, get FUCKING PSYCHED about Godzilla: King of the Monsters, and more! Open the link below, slap that play button and join us!

https://monstersconquer.podbean.com/e/ghidrah-the-three-headed-monster/

Like it? If so, SICK! We’re gonna do more! You can find us pretty much anywhere you get podcasts (the iTunes store, Spotify, Stitcher, and coming soon to the Google Play Store). Bon appetit!… for your ears?!?!